THE TRENTON BULLETIN

THE TRENTON BULLETIN

Trenton Church of Christ, Trenton, Florida

In the book of Daniel, three young men are put to a great test of character as they stood before the King of Babylon in defiance to a decree that will cost them their lives. Nebuchadnezzar had made an image of gold nearly ninety feet tall in the plain of Dura and commanded all people to fall down and worship the image at the sound of various forms of music. When the time came, all the “people, nations and languages fell down and worshiped the gold image which King Nebuchadnezzar had set up” (Daniel 3:7). In the midst of this great throng of bodies bowing down in worship three men remained standing and refused to bow. The penalty for rebellion was clear. “Whoever does not fall down and worship shall be cast immediately into the midst of a burning fiery furnace” (Daniel 3:6).

Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah were Hebrew slaves taken from their homeland in the invasion of Judah by Babylon. They had been placed in the king’s palace to serve and learn the language and literature of the Chaldeans. We know them best by their Chaldean names of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego. Brought before King Nebuchadnezzar the king gave them a second chance to reconsider their refusal to bow down and worship the image. Their reply was clear and demonstrative. "O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. If that is the case, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and He will deliver us from your hand, O king. But if not, let it be known to you, O king, that we do not serve your gods, nor will we worship the gold image which you have set up" (Daniel 3:16-18).

The three Hebrews were cast into the furnace but through the grace of God delivered without the hair of their hair singed nor were their garments affected, and the smell of fire was not on them (Daniel 3:27). God used their faith to show the king of Babylon who “rules in the kingdom of men” (Daniel 4:17). This remarkable story of courage is one fitting for our young people to embrace as they graduate High School and begin the challenging walk of life.

Two things stand out in this story: first, the importance of believing in something; secondly, the need of believing in the right thing. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego did not go along with the crowd. It was not their life’s aim to be like everyone else. They believed in something and not only believed it but were willing to disobey the law of the king because of what they believed in.

It is easy to go along with everyone else and be like the crowd. When the music began to play in the plain of Dura, thousands of people fell down to worship the image. Consider how odd they felt to be the only ones standing. Literally, everyone was bowing but these three men. They could have fallen down and who would have noticed? They possessed a belief system that challenged the moral code of the day. Young people, you must posses a system of belief to find happiness in life that will set you apart. Following the crowd will get you no where (Matthew 7:13,14).

Having a belief system is not enough – you have to believe in the right thing. They refused to worship the image because it was wrong. They stood for what was right because they stood for what God taught them. They served the Lord and not man (Acts 4:19,20; 5:29). As young people going out into the world, you must believe in the right thing and the only thing that is right is what is found in God (John 17:7). True happiness will not be found in bowing down to the music of the day. It will only come from standing for God in the face of great opposition to the norms of today. If your life is going to make a difference it must be made with the Lord as your guide and compass (John 14:6).

“Give us this day our daily bread” (Matthew 6:11). Faith means having the confidence to ask God for our needs – and the trust to ask Him for no more than we need. We must resist the hoarding instinct. It is enough that He gives us just the help we need today; we need not demand that today’s storehouse also be stocked with everything we MIGHT need tomorrow. Tomorrow’s needs will be tended to when the time comes, and faith is willing to leave all of that in God’s hands.

In the story of God’s provision of “manna” for Israel during their wilderness wandering, we get an interesting picture of how this is supposed to work. Enough manna was provided for them to eat each day, but they were strictly forbidden to gather more than one day’s supply (Exodus 16:16-21). In this way, God was teaching them to trust Him for all their needs, spiritual as well as physical, one day at a time (Deuteronomy 8:3).

When tomorrow finally gets here, what we often find is that the resources we end up needing are not nearly as great as those we thought we’d need. Most of the troubles we worry about never materialize. It was Mark Twain who had the honesty to say, “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, most of which never happened.” What if God had gone ahead and paid the premiums yesterday on all the insurance we thought we’d need against today’s problems? The truth is, we would have been supplied with resources far in excess of those we truly needed when today came. God is not so wasteful of His grace as to spend it in this way, heaping blessing upon blessing simply to satisfy our shortsighted demands for “security.”

To take each day as it comes requires a trust that is truly childlike. This youthful willingness to be dependent is so simple, and yet as tough-minded adults, it is so hard for us to maintain. We lose far too many of today’s advantages worrying about the imagined disadvantages of tomorrow. Yet in our quest for security, God is still asking us to TRUST Him. He desires that we relish the momentary joys and savor the supply of just THIS day’s needs.

“Be content to be a child, and let the Father proportion out daily to thee what light, what power, what exercises, what straits, what fears, what troubles he sees fit for thee” (Isaac Penington).

“You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered” (1 Peter 3:7).

These words easily constitute one of the toughest assignments handed out in the Bible. And by saying this, I'm not insulting women (for being difficult or incomprehensible) or impugning men (for being stupid). Rather, I am merely acknowledging the reality that communication between the sexes can be a challenge.

The single, greatest reason for this is likely the fact that God has made men and women to be different-"male and female created he them" (Genesis 1.27). A woman is not innately designed to look at things the way a man does, and a man is not inherently inclined to see things from a woman's point-of-view (just recognizing this truth is the first step toward establishing effective transgender communication). A long-running argument in anthropological circles is whether or not the differences between men and women are biological (due to nature) or cultural (due to nurture). While culture is undoubtedly responsible for some differences, the evidence for the differences being biological is undeniable (e.g., boys and girls tend to align themselves with traditional biological patterns regardless of their culture or nurture).

That men and women come into the world with different perspectives, however, does not excuse husbands from the responsibility of understanding where their wives are coming from. A husband can fathom his wife's outlook, thereby surmounting the frustration that different communication styles can cause, thereby promoting the closeness that comes from learning to speak another's language.

Although I think I glimpse some of the enormity of the obligation Peter assigns to husbands, no one should think me an expert on the subject; "clueless" is my middle name. Here, though, is some advice I would give husbands who take seriously the divine imperative to understand their wives.

• Understanding involves more than knowing. A husband can know his wife's favorite color, sweater, restaurant, etc. and still not understand her.

• Understanding involves learning your wife's communication style. Women, for example, tend to speak indirectly. What your wife may frame as a question ("Does the trash can look full to you?") may actually be a request, an order, or an expectation ("Take out the trash!").

• Understanding involves grasping your wife's communication perspective. Women tend to see communication as the glue of a relationship, whereas men tend to see it as something you do when there is a problem. For women, self-revealing conversations are valued because they make them feel close to another. Accordingly, a wife can be extremely hurt when her husband gives her the silent treatment, or she feels he is keeping secrets from her.

• Understanding involves appreciating your wife's communication rituals. For instance, when women discuss a problem, they're often looking for concern, not a solution. When a decision needs to be made, they typically want to negotiate a consensus (unilateral decisions by husbands invite resentment and are asking for trouble). Understanding your wife requires cracking her communication code.

• Understand there are exceptions to every rule. What may be true of women in general may not be true of your wife in particular. If you want to understand your wife, study her, pay attention to what she pays attention to. There is no shortcut to comprehending the feminine psyche.

In Camelot, when King Arthur asks, "How do you handle a woman?" the answer given is the truest answer of all: "love her, love her, love her." The word is not used in 1 Peter 3.7, but husbands, know this: what Peter says in this verse is what loving a woman is all about.

4. The old adage, "If you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all," is not true. Sometimes it takes courage to warn or to instruct a person so She/he is built up spiritually. It may be what is sorely needed.

We all have room to grow! Husbands & wives, parents & children, etc. need help from one another. We tend to shun it, but we need it! Have you ever tried to proofread your own work? We all need help from others who periodically shed light on our blind spots. Proverbs 16:2 Self-deception is the worst kind. The problem is not criticism--but destructive criticism. Too often, we do not know how to do it right so we avoid it all together. We must build up and not tear down!

1. Do so after a meal and not when you are hungry. Example: Esther gave two banquets before she approached the king. Afterwards, she got what she desired.

3. Consider the feelings of the other person. How do you find out when it is okay? Ask! "Honey, do you mind me sharing a constructive suggestion with you tonight?" She/he will say either "yes" or "no." If “no”, usually curiosity will cause your spouse to ask about it later. Then she/he will be mentally prepared and less defensive. Doesn't that make sense?

4. Most people want to be helped and desire honesty in the relationship if they are just approached in the right way. 5. However, "A man convinced of his will is of the same opinion still!"

1. One common failure is to pour it on! ("...And another thing, and another thing, etc.")

2. Most don't realize how critical they have become...LISTEN to yourself. (Proverbs 17:9)

WARNING: OVERDOSING KILLS THE MOTIVATION TO CHANGE! Challenge: Make it easy! Ask for it periodically.